Category: Self

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Beginner’s Guide to Getting Healthy – Your First 5 EASY Steps

Healthy Lifestyle Habits are Easier than You Think!

Me in 2016 – running daily

Do you want to get healthy but unsure of where to start? Does it feel like an overwhelming challenge so you don’t even begin? It’s possible for anyone to improve their health and feel more confident by making just a few small changes. In fact, not only is it possible it is a lot easier than you think! You just have to be committed to yourself and HONEST because you can lie to your calorie counter but your hips know the truth!

Unfortunately for me, but fortunately for you, I have had to get back into shape a few times in my life. I’ve had four pregnancies (including a set of twins) all delivered via c-sections. Then a couple times where, to be honest, I just let myself eat cookies instead of dealing with stress properly.I really hope I have learned my lesson regarding dealing with stress and that cookies don’t fix anything! Does that sound familiar to you? Yeah, I thought it would. So obviously, I have had the opportunity to pull myself out of the cookie jar and strap on my gym shoes several times in my life! Now let’s talk about the first few changes that help get the healthy lifestyle ball rolling!

2018 after I let stress derail my healthy habits

I am ready to get back to running again but the extra weight is really a drag! So I am going to have to crawl before I can walk. Now I want to share with you how I am getting started and just how easy it is to begin.  Here is my beginner’s guide to healthier lifestyle habits.

Your first 5 EASY steps that you can take to start living a healthy lifestyle or regain your previous one!

First step – For one or two weeks start tracking where you currently are regarding activity and calorie intake. That’s it. You don’t have to hit the gym yet or eat salad every day (unless you already are doing that then for God’s sake don’t stop!!) You just want to get your baseline by using a pedometer, activity tracker, whatever you want to track how many steps you are taking every day compared to how many calories you are taking in. Sometimes just seeing this information in front of your face will be motivation enough!

Second step – Now that you know how much you are eating compared to how active you are, let’s try to get those numbers a little more even. Add a 10 minute walk into your daily routine at least 3 times a week for two weeks.

Third step –  Now let’s increase the walk to 15 minutes 5 times a week for two weeks. Be honest, everyone has 15 minutes to give to themselves every day.

Fourth step – Assess your diet. Is it on point with your goals? Your health has more to do with what you put on your fork than how far your shoes travel every day. Follow the 80/20 rule. 80 percent of the time eat healthy and exercise so that the 20 percent of treats and rest won’t derail your efforts!

Fifth step – Assess how you are feeling! You have been doing these small steps for over a month! Keep up the good work and continue to build on your new healthy habits!

Please remember that weight didn’t get there overnight and it won’t go away overnight either. You are going to have to be patient and consistent. If you are honest with yourself and your efforts, then it will be a lot easier than you think to get into the healthy lifestyle habit for good!

I also want to note that not once did I mention getting on the scale. That number is not something you should focus on. If that is your only guide then it will be very easy to become discouraged with your efforts. Instead, you should focus on how you feel with these changes! How do your pants fit? How much more energy you have? Are you sleeping better? How is your growing confidence!? I know that these small changes really don’t seem like much at first glance. You will find it is so much easier to make small changes and build on them rather than trying to become an organic vegan/marathon runner overnight. Making small changes and building on them is more likely to be successful in the long run.

Here’s to a healthier you!! Congrats!! You are doing this for you and you are going to kill it!

 

Ready to join some like minded women like you? https://asleepbynine.com/jenny

 

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Finding Balance to Find Peace

 

 

Are you struggling to find work life balance? You are not alone! Every day millions of women just like you and I are trying to find a way to be and do it all. We feel guilty that our house isn’t spotless or we haven’t had a hairstyle since 2004. Did you know that makeup has an expiration date?! The kids need this, the school requires that, your new boss is a jerk and doesn’t care about your life outside of the office and your husband tries to understand but he just doesn’t get that while you look like you are holding it all together you are actually ready to cry or scream or just spontaneously combust.

You need balance.

We can’t do it all and shouldn’t expect ourselves to be able to because it isn’t fair or realistic. We see these snippets of celebrities who are thin, working in glamorous jobs all around the world with their kids happily in tow but what we don’t see is the myriad of staff that are helping them look so put together. I don’t have that. In fact sometimes I feel like I have the opposite of staff and instead have little minions whose job it is is to actually undo whatever I just spent 2 hours doing, but I digress, how do we find the balance so that we are not only surviving our lives but thriving in them? Hint: everyone’s answer is different…..and everyone’s answer is correct.

The truth is you have to figure out what works best for you and your family. If you feel like you are managing working 40+ hours a week, the kids sports schedule, and maintaining your household to your satisfaction then BRAVO! You are amazing! If you feel like you are struggling, stressed, and/or its effecting your health, then it might be time to reevaluate what is really important to you and make some changes. P.S. You are amazing!

Finding Balance to Find Peace

Prioritize

1.) Prioritize your life – what are the three most important things that you have to have/do/be to have a high level of satisfaction in your life? Is it your family, career, a new house, being physically fit? There is no wrong answer here but you have to be honest with yourself and truly define what you consider to be a “must have” or  what the airline industry calls a “no miss”. That means your “no miss” is always the priority and as long as whatever that is happens consistently and to your satisfaction then you will be happy. For airlines a “no miss” is that your plane didn’t crash. Kind of a biggie. However your luggage arriving at the same time as your plane isn’t one of them. They like it to happen, they try to make it happen but it isn’t the priority. Same with your life, figure out the three things that are your “no miss” and focus on getting those right, every single time.

Evaluate

2.) Evaluate what you chose as your “no miss” items. Is what you are doing right now aligned with making them possible? Did you choose being a class mom as a priority but you have an hour commute to your full time job? There is no way you can juggle that for any length of time without running on pure adrenaline and espresso! P.S. that will catch up to you eventually, trust me. Is it starting your own business but you are afraid to take the first step? Did you choose a new career but aren’t confident enough to leave your comfort zone to pursue it? No wonder you are stressed, the life you are living and the one you want are two completely different roads and as the saying goes, “you can’t get there from here”. Only you can decide what changes need to occur to realign your life with your goals; with the things that are going to bring you satisfaction and to truly enjoy the life you’re living.

Seek Advice

3.) Talk to someone who can help you determine how and what you need to do to find your balance. Is the only thing really tipping you over the edge being unable to keep up with the house? Look into hiring a cleaning service. Are you struggling with finding the time to go grocery shopping? Is there a way to order online so you can plan and prepare meals instead of winging it with kids in tow begging for every snack and toy they see. Do you need to make a major change? Something that will kind of change everything, talk about it with your significant other, best friend, mom, whoever you trust to be honest and supportive and really try to figure out how to make it happen. Your happiness is out there waiting for you to have the cojones to chase after it!

Come hang out with other fun women just like you! http://www.asleebynine.com/jenny

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Are you dating your spouse?

We might be getting serious.

I’m currently dating my husband…or he is dating me…not sure really but we have been dating for a while now. I think things are getting pretty serious. We have been married for almost 11 years, together over 12. With the stresses of kids, two jobs, running a household, and holy shit stuff is expensive, we made a deal that we would go out together, just us, at least twice a month. We often run out of ideas and new places to go but we always go.

Why? Why do we do it?

We do it because once all the dust settles, the kids are grown moving on with their lives then it will be just the two of us. Just the two of us staring at each other across the kitchen table in the morning wondering, “Now what do we do?”. I don’t want to be sitting across from some stranger who I haven’t really seen or spent any time with in the last 18 years.

Nothing fancy.

Sometimes we just meet each other for lunch while the kids are in school. Then there are other times we hire a babysitter, schedule a sleepover at mom mom’s house and go out to dinner. It is almost NEVER something that would warrant 20 selfies and appear like we are living it up way more than any of our friends. In fact, the occasional selfie is rare but once in a while we are feeling millennial and take one. Date nights are more important than just getting away from the kids. Eating your dinner at the temperature that it was meant to be served at. Date nights are a reminder of just why you have this crazy life in the first place. You fell in love. You fell in love with each other and created the mayhem that now consumes you all day every day. I doubt you could you ever imagine not having this craziness!? I know I couldn’t and remembering why I choose to create chaos of my life with him, that is why I make sure that we are still dating.

 

Want to meet other fun ladies looking for support? www.lularoejenniferwilliams.com

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Is The Greatest Showman a lesson in being human?

 

Being Human. Humanity is defined as ‘the fact or condition of being human’ according to the Oxford Dictionary. What does it mean to be human? Maybe P.T. Barnum was ahead of his time. Yes I am aware that the movie does not depict him in reality, maybe not much at all to be honest. He was far more likely in it for the buck than anything, BUT what if his story had a grander purpose, maybe beyond anything he or the movie producers ever imagined. If the movie does anything besides entertain us, it certainly causes us to pause and think about those around us, those who we associate with on a grander scale.

Exactly what does it mean to be human? It is not just enough to be human in our own right but to see the humanity of others. Aren’t we all different? Isn’t there something about each one of us that makes us feel awkward at times, weird……different…….not accepted? If there is anything that this movie reminded me is that each one of us IS weird, different, and in a way that is what makes us all exactly the same. It is a common bond that should be celebrated, and shouted from every rooftop! We are all unique…different….weird….human.

What if every restaurant you ever walked into served the same exact food, at the same exact time, and there was never any variation or variety? How boring would life be if we were all a cookie cutter version of each other? We need to embrace the comfort of diversity.

What if we lived in a world where everyone was seen and accepted for who they are because let’s be honest, isn’t that what all of us crave anyway?  Acceptance.

Isn’t it up to us? Don’t we, collectively as humans and as a society, determine what is “expected”, normal even….?

I realize that this post is a series of questions but hopefully it makes you think. Remember the Golden Rule? “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”

Want to read more by Jenny? https://asleepbynine.com

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Mom in the Middle

What do you do when you are a mom in the middle? When your child’s diagnosis isn’t obvious, when your kid seems normal to strangers at first but other kids recognize right away that they aren’t the same as them. When your child’s diagnosis is not something you want to draw attention to because with work and effort they will reach mainstream and grow into a “normal” adult. When you know that all your child wants is to be liked by everyone else but they aren’t and you aren’t sure to how to explain it to others or whether or not you need to.

What the fuck do you do?

How do you explain it? To other parents? To other kids?

My son has social pragmatic communication disorder. How do you explain that without going into this deep conversation over fine motor skills, impulse control issues, and the inability to process normal social behavior over a few beers without sounding like a maniac that someone just wants to grab their drink and walk away from?

My son is kind and gentle, he doesn’t have a mean bone in his body yet he is the target of bullies on the playground because of it. Because with his diagnosis he doesn’t recognize those who aren’t interested in being kind and gentle. Other parents don’t see why I am so protective of him because he “looks normal” or “he is having fun”, but other kids know when they have stopped having fun but he hasn’t stopped doing whatever it was that made them laugh. See he doesn’t recognize when the other kids don’t think something is funny anymore. Other kids mistake his enthusiasm for not listening when they say stop. Its hard because I see why the other kids don’t understand when he doesn’t stop doing something when they say stop. I also understand that my son sees that they thought it was funny once and doesn’t understand or recognize why it isn’t funny anymore.

It kills me as a mom to see him struggle to connect with other kids. I totally understand as an adult that other kids see that he is different. I just wish that my role was more well defined. I can’t make him understand social cues yet because he is still learning basic social skills. He has a very defined line between right and wrong so traversing the gray area is extremely challenging for him. Juggling the myriad of emotions and subtle nonverbal cues is totally out of his wheelhouse. Yet it absolutely kills me as an adult not only a mom to just let him figure things out for himself.

So as a mom in the middle I sit here and hope that I can create enough situations that allow him to grow as an individual, learn social norms, expand his circle of friends just enough, and that it all comes together naturally in the end.

 

Interested in more? https://asleepbynine.com

 

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Sudden Weight Gain and Loss in Confidence

Have you struggled with your self confidence after a sudden weight gain? Well it happened to me too. My body decided to play a few tricks on me and between the hormone malfunctions and medications I found myself a little extra fluffy in a short period of time. To say that it affected my self confidence is an understatement and the irony isn’t lost on me that I help women feel confident in their own skin daily, yet I let it get to me. My inner mean girl said horrible things to me, things I would NEVER say to anyone else, but I let her thrive, I listened to her and believed that she was right. Why was that ok? Why was it ok for her to talk to me that way?

She tells me “don’t post that selfie, you’re too fat, no one wants to see you”.

As women we tend to be so hard on ourselves as it is, and many factors in our society and movies lead us to believe that if we are overweight that there is someone wrong with us. That we are no longer beautiful. Why on Earth do we listen to that nonsense?! Everything about us is just as frigging amazing as it was before, the only thing that has changed is our dress size. That shouldn’t define us. If our best friend or our daughter came to us saying these terrible things about themselves we would quickly correct them and remind them of how awesome they are. Why aren’t we are own cheerleader? Besides that, you know what else I have learned? You probably don’t look as bad to anyone else as you do to your inner mean girl anyway. We stand in front of the mirror and stare at every little ripple, roll, and “flaw” telling ourselves that its the first thing people see when they look at you. Guess what……it’s not. The people who love you have noticed your weight gain (maybe) and they still love you just the same. As far as people who don’t know you, they have no idea you were ever anything than what you are right now!

So head up, shoulders straight, look yourself square in the eye and say, “Girl YOU ROCK and you never liked that mean girl anyway!”!

 

Interested in meeting other confident women? Come join the fun http://www.lularoejenniferwilliams.com